I used to hate, hate, hate exercise. About 8 years ago I got to a point with my weight where I was totally disgusted with myself. I resolved to lose weight. I decided to put myself on a 2000 calorie diet (because that's what "they" always say is a good amount) and to exercise everyday. I was in school full-time (my last semester) and was working full-time at McDonald's. I counted calories diligently (I now know the caloric content of every menu item at McD). I was pretty tired every day but I urged myself to exercise even just 20 minutes per day. I didn't want to go to the gym or be in public, so I started my own aerobic dancing in my basement apartment (thank God it was the basement!). Doing 20 minutes was so hard at times. I even knew how many songs on certain CDs added up to 20 minutes and rarely went past it.
In some ways it was a good semester. I lost 25 pounds that I have never regained. On the other hand, I was a slave to the calorie numbers. Sometimes I felt starved for more. Other times I ate when I wasn't hungry just because I had extra calories to spare. It's an obsessive place to be in.
I had an even more obsessive time about 4 years ago which was successful for only about 4 months and all of the weight quickly returned.
I'm thankful that the Lord has taught and grown me into a person that doesn't have to calorie count everything (although I still have a very strong tendency towards that) and I exercise if I want and if I have time. No more beating myself up for not exercising. Well, I'm not totally free of it yet. Is it possible to be free-er?
In my yoga class the last couple of weeks the instructor has asked us to "send positive energy" to her daughter who has been diagnosed with thyroid cancer. It makes me cry. I don't know what "positive energy" is or what it is supposed to do. However, I DO KNOW the King of the universe and He loves her so. I pray for them to know Jesus and for Him to get all of the glory for any successful treatment that she may get. I can't remember the daughter's name, but her mom is Gladys if you'd like to pray for her.
What a privilege! To know the Maker of all heaven and earth!
Psalm 8 (Amplified)
1 O LORD, our Lord, how excellent (majestic and glorious) is Your name in all the earth! You have set Your glory on [or above] the heavens.
2 Out of the mouths of babes and unweaned infants You have established strength because of Your foes, that You might silence the enemy and the avenger.
3 When I view and consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers, the moon and the stars, which You have ordained and established,
4 What is man that You are mindful of him, and the son of [earthborn] man that You care for him?
5 Yet You have made him but a little lower than God [or heavenly beings], and You have crowned him with glory and honor.
6 You made him to have dominion over the works of Your hands; You have put all things under his feet:
7 All sheep and oxen, yes, and the beasts of the field,
8 The birds of the air, and the fish of the sea, and whatever passes along the paths of the seas.
9 O Lord, our Lord, how excellent (majestic and glorious) is Your name in all the earth!
Psalm 115:15
May you be blessed by the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
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