I don't wanna

I am in a serious place of "I don't wanna". I think I've been in it for about 2 weeks. I keep fighting it, trying to keep it going, but it's like I'm dragging myself through quick sand.

Did you have senior-itis in high school or university? You were so close to meeting a goal after so much time AND vacation that you just didn't want to do any more? I am so there.

First, I have had vacation mentality for a couple of weeks. Wednesday was my birthday and on the 14th we leave for a 2 week vacation. It's hard to motivate myself to do work at my job and to do things around the house.

Second, even though I've never read Thin Within before, I've read a lot about it on blogs over the last 5-6 months and I've been working on practicing the 0-5 eating (which comes and goes) and exercising. I've gone down by about 10% of my weight (yay), but the lazy part of me gets tripped up when I hit a plateau. Lazy Yvonne wants to lay on the couch and watch TV :

Third, my husband is interviewing for a job that would move us to another state - much closer to the ocean than Phoenix - and I'm already dreaming about it (...no desert, rolling hills, crashing waves, greenery, cool breezes...)

That's where my mind WANTS to be. However, just as we're learning from the Thin Within book, I need to put my mind on Christ in the present. Not looking ahead at what may or may not be, not looking to the past, but focusing on NOW. There is only one June 5th 2009 in the all of eternity. Why waste it?

Lord, help me to focus on You in the present. This moment is all I have. Show me how to spend it in a way that glorifies You and takes the focus off of myself and my desires. Wherever You take me Lord, You are there already and I want to be willing to follow Your lead. In Psalm 119:105 the psalmist said, "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path." You give me a light for my feet so I know which step to take next, rather than giving me a flood lamp to show me the whole route. You are trustworthy, Lord. Help my lazy unbelief!

Oh God, You are my God and I will ever praise You.

I will seek You in the morning and I will learn to walk in Your ways

And step by step You'll lead me and I will follow You all of my days.